takeheartgirl on Xanga

takeheartgirl

Name: Emily
Country: United States
Metro: St. Cloud
Birthday: 5/10/1987
Gender: Female

Interests: I love music no matter what. There is not enough room for me. I like boys who will break my heart. Cuddling is always fun. I like to make out on the weekends. I'm learning how to break out of my shell. I'm lost without him.
Expertise: Over analyzing my emotions.
Occupation: Customer service/support

Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:

mika mewz
MSN: punkrock_creations
Yahoo:

punkrock_creations

Member Since: 11/15/2004

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Blogrings

:: what it is to burn ::
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senses fail
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All I want is an emo boy
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i [heart] emo boys
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i was born with a broken heart
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i just really love my randomness...
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! My Chemical Romance !
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we are playground lovers<3
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Posting Calendar

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Wednesday, August 03, 2005

So my heart is like a gaping open wound.

Yeah, that's so cliche.

I love a boy. I have loved him for 2 years now. Maybe I loved him even before I knew he existed. I'm not sure. He's my only one.

Sometimes I think that we're growing farther and farther apart. The distance, and the people that come between us tear us apart. I feel like giving up sometimes. Now I'll be leaving, he'll be leaving. A million miles away from each other. I'm clenching on so tight to him, that maybe he does hate me. I love him with my entire heart&soul. I know we belong together, and I know that we should be together forever. I try not to let these things come between us, but with broken trust it's so hard. The future makes me nervous.

I wish he could just push those people aside and love me forever. I know it isn't fair. It's not what he wants. But what else can I do? It's like I have no other choice. I can't just accept that fact. It'll hurt me to the depths of me. The pain will follow me around where ever I went. He doesn't seem to see that. He doesn't realize how much it breaks my heart.

I could sit here and gush about him for hours, but it would make no difference. Why can't you just understand? It makes me so angry that you would rather have them in your life than me. Because they're a temporary feeling, that is wonderful. I'm just old feelings. That's what I feel like you see when you look at me. I know you don't love me the same anymore. Do you realize how much that tears me apart? Because I love you so much that I would give up my dreams for you.
Yeah, there is no one else like you darling. You're the only one that has captured me like you have. You're my world.

It's like even if I wanted to give you up, I know I couldn't. I feel like you could drop me in a second. I feel so vulnerable because you own my heart.

I wish you knew.

Your green eyes are so beautiful. I love the feeling of your body against mine. The warmth is like no other. The feeling is like no other. What could prove my feelings for you?

First, you have to notice me.

*Mae*
Wasted time
I can not say that
I was ready for this
But when worlds collide
And all that I have
Is all that I want
The words seem to flow
And the thoughts
They keep running.
And all that I have is yours
All that I am is yours

Ohh...

Painted skies
I've seen so many
That cannot compare
To your ocean eyes
The pictures you took
That cover your room
And it was just like the Sun
But more like the Moon
A light that cant
Reach at all
So now im branded
For taking the fall

So when you say forever
can't you see
You've already captured me?

7:05 PM - 1 view - 4 eprops - 2 comments - email it

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Okay, so I haven't written in forever like I promised... But I thought no one read this thing anyway.

I guess Amber does! I love you Amber!

I don't have a Myspace anymore because it's stupid.

My life in the last few months have changed drasticlly.

So, I graduated from High School, blah blah.

I want more freedom. I am on that constant search for finding my true self.

Trying to find my meaning.

But anyway...

I'm currently living with a friend since I got sick of the bull shit I had to put up with at my house. I do love my family though and I do miss them.

I do need to grow up though.

Today: I went to Buffalo to buy things. I did buy things. Jimmy has an interview at Target tomorrow. Thank God! I am praying (If God is listening) that he will get this chance to make his life turn around.

I had to work at 4. Major headache. Major pain in my ASS! I hate it there.

Now I am relaxing, talking to people. So don't forget to talk to me on AIM:: xburn my bridges

emily jean

11:36 PM - 1 view - 2 eprops - 1 comment - email it

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

I can't stand to be alone. And I am afraid to face him. He wont understand. Everything is the same as it used to be. I need him, but I hate the fact that I do. Does he honestly think I love it? Does he really understand that if I could be fine without him, I would in a heartbeat. It's hard looking for someone who is never there. Maybe he doesn't do anything wrong. But he also doesn't take care of me.

Because I feel so alone, and even when he is there, I still don't have him like I used to. Why wont he understand? Does he know what it feels like to be alone?

Nights like this are never ending.

2:41 PM - 4 views - 4 eprops - 2 comments - email it

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Currently Playing
So Long Astoria
By Ataris
see related

I wont spend another night alone...

I'm giving up this time on him. I'm letting him have what he wants so no matter how bad he wants me in the picture I am out of the picture.

Now everyone of his friends hate me after this. But what have I done?

After all of these times, he still doesn't trust me. He's the one who left me for somebody else, and he is the one who looks at other people besides me. He's always looking right through me.

I'm waiitng here to find nothing at all.

10:58 PM - 1 view - 4 eprops - 2 comments - email it

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Myspace... I love it.

I love xanga too.

I promise I will write more.

10:51 PM - 1 view - add eprops - add comments - email it

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